Funnily enough, my husband and I went to the same gastro pub, in Hullbridge, a few weeks after my first major operation.
We had less than two weeks until our wedding and my husband suggested a childfree dinner to celebrate my recovery from that operation and cancer free status at that time.
As we drove back home, there was the most beautiful sunset - we played our 'walking down the aisle' song - which by the way was 'Everlong' by Foo Fighters - and afterwards we laughed that we were over the worst of our bad luck; unfortunately we were very wrong.
I'll take you back all the way to the beginning, before I was a wife and a mother, back when I was much less responsible and years before I met my husband.
In 2010 I went travelling. I had been at university studying Fine Art and was living in such a small claustrophobic town for most of my life, in the same house as my parents.
At the age of twenty; I was bored.
Two of my male friends from school were already travelling in South East Asia and so I packed up on 11th November 2010 and joined them. The most incredible months were spent travelling Thailand, Cambodia and Laos - from the busy cities of Bangkok, Siem Reap and Phnom Penh- bustling markets of fresh produce, smells of spices, lemongrass and smoking pork cooked over a fire. The land of smiles, beautiful beaches, crystal clear oceans, Cambodia's heartbreaking history during the 1970s and learning of new new languages whilst appreciating and respecting new cultures.
During my travels, I spent time in a jungle, just north of rural Cambodia and we spent a night with two mahout's deep in the jungle, who did not speak a word of English; we spent the evening with them communicating only with the power of mime. They cooked us fish on a small fire and showed us how to eat fish heads dipped in fresh lime, chilli and fish sauce. We drank rice wine and remarkably managed to communicate in playing card games which the mahout's won and we had the most wonderful night under the stars. We slept in hammocks in a bamboo shelter and travelled back to the village the next morning via elephant - who I believe to be treated well, but my naivety and inexperience is no excuse if I am found to be incorrect.
They were the craziest months - I ate tarantula and got a tattoo.
I was living my best life.
I returned to my hometown penniless and began working in an office to earn some money. Within a few weeks I got an awful pain in the bottom of my spine - where my coccyx was. I couldn't sit properly and I could hardly walk.
I called in sick and whilst lying in bed, the most excruciating pain took over my lower back and I found a thick fluid or pus flowing from a small hole just above my bum, where my coccyx was.
Straight away I was sure I had a small creature burrowed inside me from my travels - you could see through the hole and I could feel a lump. Terrified there was a worm from the jungle living inside me, I went to my local GP who explained there was indeed a cyst there but to remove it would come under 'cosmetic surgery' and I would need to pay for it. Being a broke ex backpacker who was weeks into her first grown up job - I didn't have the money and so was advised to just 'live with it'.
I would now like to press fast forward to 2017. During which time I had settled into my career - I had worked my way up and had landed a brilliant job as a Personal Assistant for the last four years, in a great company, leaning into roles in both Legal and Compliance.
I had also bought my first house with my fiancé - who by this time I had been with since 2013.
I had also just given birth to twin boys.
My pregnancy was smooth sailing and the birth was long, painful and as expected with a three day labour.
There were a few issues along the way but our beautiful twin boys were born on 3rd February 2017 at approximately fifteen minutes apart (we were close to midnight of 4th February and I was told to push as much as possible to avoid the boys being born of two different dates!) .
I believe I had slight post natal depression at the beginning (undiagnosed) and I have to say - to compare the hospital care later on in my journey - the treatment from some of the midwives after birth was not reassuring. I believe some people should not work in that chosen industry if they do not have empathy or compassion, especially when dealing with tired, sensitive, hormonal new mothers (I heard one midwife telling a tearful new mother that she had the 'wrong nipples' to breastfeed her baby).
But luckily within three days I was out of hospital but the backpain was back - easily dismissed as birth pain.
Six weeks later my husband and I arrived at our GP surgery for the six weekly check on our new babies and myself.
Along with everything else, I mentioned the back pain; again the cyst was mentioned and again I was told this was cosmetic. Having two newborns this was pushed to the back of our minds; we were first time parents, sleep deprived and swept into a vortex of nappies, babygrows and breast milk.
Little did we know, that the birth of our precious twins would shine a light on another, different and unique tumour that had been growing in my body for over twenty six years and the discovery of this would potentially save my life.
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