What a pain in the a***

So there we were, on a sunny day in July 2019, standing on London Bridge waiting for my mum to meet the twins and I. She had kindly agreed to entertain them in the hospital waiting room whilst I went along to my appointment with my new consultant, the gynecologist.  At the hospital, my kids and mum firmly plotted in the waiting area (mum loaded with bananas and biscuits - good luck mum) I was waiting next to the room for my appointment.  Remember here, I had a wedding - my OWN wedding, in just over eight weeks away at this point. So in between appointments throughout, I was emailing various people, companies and ticking my wedding 'to do' list off. Whilst emailing, I had accidently scrolled onto a page for sexy 'wedding night' lingere, when my new male consultant, looking over my shoulder, called me in.  It set the mood for the vaginal examination appointment perfectly and I would have usually made a whitty comment about it but it was clear from the first thrity seconds...

Today, I woke up - in pain as usual - and whilst I was gobbling my painkillers I remembered I had a dream about eating homemade sausage rolls.  That was it - I had the urge to make homemade sausage rolls, there was no going back and to top it all off I wanted to make a homemade crumble as well.  Autumn is my favourite month by far - I love Halloween and I adore the colours on the trees, the sunny yet fresh weather, apples and conkers on the dewy grass and the smell of mixed spice, cinammon and bacon.  I made a pact with myself back when we moved in to our home and started our family, that I would be that mum who baked and cooked from scratch - especially in autumn when the weather is turning cold - and thats exactly what I became and I rather enjoy it (when I don't have a child hanging from my ankles).  Unfortunately though, the recent operations over the last fourteen months have taken that away from me for the time being, as my energy levels are incredibly low....

2019 was a big year for us; we were getting married.  We had a wedding venue booked  for 19th September, we had sent out the wedding invitations and I was full blown excited bride ('bridezilla'?) mode.  2019 has already started off as an unlucky year for us - in January I broke my ankle whilst running in order to lose weight for our impending wedding. In March, my beloved cat Jasmine passed away at  the ripe old age of 24 - to which I was absolutely devastated. Later on that spring my husband was a victim of identity fraud and around the same time my brother was in a big car accident but luckily managed to come away unscratched and unharmed.  2019 was looking like an unlucky year to get married - but it was only the beginning.  Father's day 2019 started off as any other special occasion in our house. My husband had a well deserved lie in whilst I busily dealt with the twins, getting them dressed, fed and ready for the day.  My husband made his way down...

A Sacrococcygeal Teratoma (SCT) is a rare type of tumour known as a teratoma that develops at the base of the coccyx (tailbone).  S acrococcygeal teratoma's are benign 75% of the time, malignant and life threatening 12% of the time and the remainder are considered 'immature teratoma's' that share benign and malignant features.  Benign  sacrococcygeal teratoma's are more likely to develop in younger children who are less than five months old and older children are more likely to develop malignant  sacrococcygeal teratoma's. S acrococcygeal teratoma's are usually found in stages (depending on their relative extent inside or outside the body);  - Type 1 - Are external (outside the body) tumours and are attached to the tailbone.  - Type 2 - Have both internal (inside the body) and external parts.  - Type 3 - Can be seen from the outside but most of the tumour is inside the abdomen.  - Type 4 - The most serious: can't be seen from the outside - they ar...

Funnily enough, my husband and I went to the same gastro pub, in Hullbridge, a few weeks after my first major operation.  We had less than two weeks until our wedding and my husband suggested a childfree dinner to celebrate my recovery from that operation and cancer free status at that time.  As we drove back home, there was the most beautiful sunset - we played our 'walking down the aisle' song - which by the way was 'Everlong' by Foo Fighters - and afterwards we laughed that we were over the worst of our bad luck; unfortunately we were very wrong.  I'll take you back all the way to the beginning, before I was a wife and a mother, back when I was much less responsible and years before I met my husband.  In 2010 I went travelling. I had been at university studying Fine Art and was living in such a small claustrophobic town for most of my life, in the same house as my parents. At the age of twenty; I was bored.  Two of my male friends from school were already tra...

Today, I am going out for lunch.  A nice lunch, Sunday lunch, at a decent gastro pub in Hullbridge - not too far away from where we live.  I'm determined to dress up; put on some make up, wear a pair of heels that I bought months ago and never wore; due to a certain global pandemic, do my hair and dress like a millionaire.  A millionaire that only got released from hospital two days beforehand.  I have just had a serious major operation - my second in fifteen months. Due to said global pandemic, I was isolated in my hospital room for ten days. I was released into a new season and new government rules regarding social distancing, safety curfews and laws.  I was released with an impressive set of stitches, a great deal of pain, no coccyx and a new diet.  I was released to great support and overwhelming messages. Talk about a whirlwind of emotions!  I have new found knowledge since my stay in hospital and new found gratitude to the simplest of things - yo...